Mental Floss Songtext

No more nonsense.



The assassination occurred

At three thirty.

No one was there to witness it.

Even the breviaries had left

Their tapestries on the window.

And we were all silenced

By the sad mildewed cloud

That followed around.


I wish I was back in the land of the,

Of the, uh, hmm...



You can't pin that one on me.

I didn't do a goddamn thing.

I was just standing there

Then a bunch of guys came up

And started laying all this shit on me.

Now what am I supposed to do?

I'm an American.

You can't touch me.



Did you know all nuns are forty-two,

And their eyes are blue?

Did you know all tablecloths

Are white in France?

Did you know women wear underpants?

Well they do.



How does a musician imitate

The sound of underpants sliding

Over a woman's thighs,

Down over her ankles,

And over her little toes,

And the rings on her toes,

And her unclipped toe nails.



Lightning struck the magic purse.



I didn't do a damn thing, man.

I was just standing there

In front of the delicatessen

And all these rabbis ran up

And a bunch of Indians

And freaks and monsters

And just started talking

In all these weird languages.

What could I say?



Hey I'm tired of being a freaky musician.

I want to be Napoleon.

Let's have some more wars around here.

What a stinking shitty little war

We have running over there.

Let's get a big one.

A real big one.

With a lot of killings and bombs and blood.



School days, school days

Good old-fashioned rule days.

School days, school days

Good old-fashion rule days.



Source: Edited version of a longer piece performed at the Aquarius Theater - July 22, 1969