Ugly Woman Songtext

She won't complain if you just bust in her quick, shit
She better be happy she got thrust with a stiff dick
And she'd never cheat, dawg. I'm trustin' this bitch wit
Anybody even drunk you wouldn't catch 'em in the place
When she was born the doctor even smacked her in the face
I introduce her to my boys, they tried to hold me back
I told em, "I ain't Shallow Hal, dawg, I know she fat!"
Fuck it, at least she make sure I don't see her when I wake up
Cause she's so ugly she need to creep up on her make-up
Can lead a prenup if we break up, cause we never will
Won't give her plastic surgery even if I get a deal
For Halloween kids go as her but of course
It's tricky cause kids gotta find the fur of a horse
This Session tellin' you to get the ugly chick freak and
Trust me, mistreat her cause never the musty bitch cheatin'

[Tonedeff:]
Yo Son, I'm sick of these pretty bitches, they're a nightmare to deal with
Hoes actin' like they deserve to have their heels licked
with fake or even real tits, It's like they wantin fame for their appearance So, I made a severe switch, let me explain what the deal is
I met this ugly bitch in the fish section of market
I mean for real, this bitch looked like Linda Tripp's illegitimate armpit
And yeah, the sex was a bit awkward, but trust me fam
I covered her head with a pillowcase while yellin out, "Fuck the klan!"
We go to clubs to dance, the floor clears, bouncers shout
Hit up the carnival, they hand her a job app for the haunted house
And I get mad confused when it comes to humpin' around
She asks me to fuck her ass but then tells me, "You fucka mah mouf!"
And I'm buggin' out cause it's fucked up when your girl gets her nails painted
And the first thing you think is, "You get a face lift?"
Would I trade? Sheeeit...Man, I can't call it
It's a marriage of convenience and I always get the handicapped parking

[Chorus x2]

[Substantial:]
Yeah, yo
Got this girl, she's remiscin' of Cole's Big Shirly
Burly, she dont know the definition of girly
When it's early, she runs a mile with me on her shoulders
Nickname's Jawbones, teeth look like she bite boulders
You might notice there's no talk of head mentioned
Cuz the time I got it it was like another circumcision (ow, it hurts!)
Listen, her naked you'd hate to see
So brolic when we have sex it's like she rapin' me
And I ain't a small dude, you should hear her talk too
How boo got more bass in her voice than I do? (I love you)
Yeah baby, whatever you say
Bikini wax? Her bush look like a fuckin' toupet
No choice but to take one for the team or it's curtains
Can't prove it but I think she might've killed my old girlfriend
Downer, but it's useful bein' around her
Cause when we in the club I got my own personal bouncer

[PackFM:]
Yo, it don't bug me that she's ugly as long as she loves me
And when we out in public she has to promise not to hug me
Ok, shes kinda chubby but her smiles cute, dont knock it
She got three teeth, two in her mouth and one in her pocket
Let's not kid, I'm positive that she ain't gonna leave me
She can't chew through a new leash, she only got two teeth
We go to dark places like the movies. Dinner? think not
Can't use a knife and fork, I gotta feed her with a slingshot
Get a doggy bag only hit it doggy style
Can't blame her mom and dad for makin' her an only child
You don't want a bunch of those things runnin' around the house
We'll be safe as long as you can't get pregnant through the mouth
I know what fly chicks are about and fuckin' wit' 'em isn't smart
They'll burn a hole in your pocket and it spreads to your heart
So if your ratin's more than eight to ten and you high maintenance
Better have an ugly friend cause I'll be datin' them

She's ugly as sin
The bitch has goat titties
She suckles migdet on them
The bitches toes are longer than her fingers
She dips her big toe in ink and writes me love letters
The bitches vagina looks like a wombat dipped in chewed bubblegum
It's disgusting